bLaZe's InNeR WorkINgS- 2

heLLo AgAin...
WhaT ThE FUCK aRe YOU
looking at!!??

SigH---------------------------------

WhaT am i GoNNa Do??
I hAVe aBSOluteLY no CLuE!!

I sHouLd Go DO something
INSTead oF DoiN THIS stupid BLOG!!!
WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!!
UGH!!!!!!

whats the point....

LIFE should be SIMPLE


Too bad it's not.

Facebook is EVIL!!!

Have you ever heard of the social-networking phenomena of the century? That's right. I'm talking about facebook. Or, as i like to call it, "stalking made easy". It is, without a doubt, the Devil in disguise!! Swallowing lives WHOLE! Right before your very eyes!! It's as deadly as it's games are stupid and repetitive. Oh yeah, you heard right it's got those annoying little games that suck in BILLIONS of people and waste all their time making little virtual FARMS or CAFES!!!

It really should be outlawed as a crime.

But don't just listen to my crazy rantings, here are some qoutes from some err, very "real" people:
"appalling, just appalling. i mean really! It's just so disturbing!"
"Facebook is like that bad cramp in my left leg, it just wont go away!"
"I just hope the children wont find out about this..."
"I wish it would DIE!!!!!"

Shocking isn't it? How many people who have been negatively affected by this catastrophic social networking messiah. Oh if only someone would just stand up to this evil menace! Stand up and FIGHT for whats right!!

...Oh well, I guess i can't really complain. I'm a blog writer, and blogs are even more accessible than Facebook is. Why, by just a click of a button I'm able to complain and whine about anything i damn well please! It's sort of scary isn't it? The power held by these amazing blogs.


I guess nothing can stop them now.

My Flying-V Guitar

Today I'm gonna tell you about the second most absolute, amazing thing in my life. (the first, being of course, my even more amazing girlfriend) My FLYING-V GUITAR!!!! For those of you out there who don't know what it is, it is simply put THE BEST GUITAR STYLE EVER!!!!!!! It is the love of my life. This beauty is so great that words can't describe its magnificence!!.... which sorta defeats the purpose of this post.... OH WELL!! I've written about weird, supposedly unexplainable things before!!

 anyways 

This guitar is, obviously, in the shape of a V. A pure crimson red paint gives it that excellent finish that's to die for. With a small amount of black highlights. The cool thing is it's all symmetrical too!! stylish or what!? But i haven't even said the best thing about this yet.
it is a ROBOT!! 


Thats right!! a freaken ROBOT!! It has a will of its own. It can tune itself, just from a simple strum! Definitely a force to be reckoned with. No one will be able to withstand it's unstoppable force. 

with me and my V. We'll rule the world.

Baskin AND Robbins

It has recently come to my attention that a certain ice-cream franchise is under a false name. I believe that "Baskin Robbins" should be instead called "Baskin AND Robbins".

There are a number of good points to this name change mind you. ONE good reason is that it makes way more sense if you add that AND simply because this business was founded by TWO different people. not ONE but TWO!! This obviously implies that there should be an AND because we're talking about TWO different people. Eliminating any chance of misconception between the two founders.

My other good reason for changing the name is that i just spent about 7 minutes making an AWESOME new logo for them. It's almost exactly the same as their old one, only this one has an AMAZING 'N' in it! With a unique "shitty" colour to it. Which symbolizes how damn annoying their take-away is when you open up the box and all the flavors are melted together and  look pretty much like runny crap you find in places you don't wanna know.

SO in conclusion: VOTE FOR THE AND in Baskin AND Robbins!!!!!

I'M BACK BABY!!

Well, well, well. Here i am again. back to the exiled blog of exiled-ness. catchy name, no? Anyways, whats important is i'm back!! And BETTER then EVER! i can assure you. Recently i've suffered an intense writers block, unable to write or think up ANYTHING for AGES!! So i decided to take a little break from all this.

But woah boy, alotta crazy stuff has happened durin' this time. I auditioned for a play, Lost a love, Made a friend, ripped up a shirt and accidentally got a hefty phone bill..... yeeaahh, pretty wild OR WHAT!?    anyways
After all of these life experiences something has miraculously dawned upon me: When life gives you shit, you give it some back!! Don't give up and never let other peoples weird looks they give put you down... after all WHAT DO THEY KNOW ANYWAY??

As much as i'd like to continue this epic, amazing, awesome, fantastic, wicked, uber story, I really must be off now.

This is Exiledmicrobe, KEEPIN' IT REAL!!...or not...whichever.

BlAzE's InnER WorkINGs- 1

HeLlO SMalL DumPlInG.
FanCY a Cup oF TeA?
OR perHapS a BitE To EAT EH?
No? oH thaTS A shaME, You haD SUCH pROmise!

Too BAd.
I DIDn't thInk iT wOUlD HavE to..
end like THIS.

Ahh well, that is JUST HOW the
COOKie CrUMblES.
tut, TUT, TuT,
Why Do THE STUPID, haVE tO die SO YOUNg!?

Bringing goggles back to the status quo!!

Have you ever seen goggles before?
No, i don't mean swimming goggles.
I mean proper, real, super wicked awesome goggles!!

...Basically big glasses that strap around your head.

Yeah, i know most people might think of them as "lame" and "dorky",
But i know the truth!! i can see the awesomeness behind this sadly uncommon eye wear!!

Which is why I have decided to make it my life long goal, TO BRING GOGGLES BACK!! BOO YEAH!!

I swear, with the power bestowed upon me, that i'll make goggles come back up from the ashes, and make them as common as an afro wig! (wait, are they common anymore?) Just wait and see! In the next few years, your gonna be seeing ALOT more goggle action going on. annd maybe if it isn't in a few years, give it at least 10!! I'll make it eventually!

Just you wait and see.

THE FIGHT AGAINST LOL

Lol is a funny little thing isn't it? It can be used in almost any online chat situation:

lol hello
lol wassup?
hey hey lol
who are you again? lol
LOL
for the love of lol
HOLY SHIT!! lol
lol that is funny
my mother just died in a car crash. lol.
lololololololol

Yes lol is indeed one of the most widely used terms throughout text chatting history. It makes me wonder who made it up anyway? i mean, who could be messed up enough to think of saying "laughing out loud" to someone? not only is it bad grammar, but most of the time nothing anyone says is ever that funny. people just say it more and more because they're too lazy to think of anything better to say. it's really just a sentence filler used to make it look like you're trying to have a long heartfelt conversation with some one, such as in this example sentence:

lol, hey how are you? lol, hows life? lol, any better then yesterday? lol

now can someone please tell me how the hell someone can laugh out loud that many times in one sentence?? heh, it's actually pretty scary, it's like the "lol" are living things too. did you know they're evolving?

From the humble lol, you then have it branch of in different directions such as:

LMFAO: laughing my f*cking arse off
LOLL: laughing out loud lots
LAWFITS: laughing alot while flying in the sky
LOLZ: laughing out loud, z?
LOLX: see lolz, but replace z with x
And there are many, many more where that came from i can assure you.

Which brings me to my main agenda, it's time to FIGHT BACK THE LOL!!
Join me for the fight of your life, and take down the lol-ing oppression. It's only a matter of time before we start saying "lol" in PUBLIC. Can you imagine a world, where "lol" is the social norm, how we actually TALK how we type. It is a world, far, far worse, than one could imagine. So please, for the sake of everyones health, safety and well being. STOP TYPING LOL!

...lol

Origins: how Exiled microbe was born

AND NOW. THE MOST EXCITING STORY OF THE CENTURY!!!!! HOW MY NAME "EXILED MICROBE" CAME TO BE:

It was a cold and dreary mid-summers eave. The candles were burning dimly in my living room as I inhaled their scented goodness. A soft glow showered the room as i sighed heavily. Pondering what i should do. I was on an island in the pacific ocean, and i had nothing to do. (well, nothing i could be bothered to do) AND THEN, ALL OF A SUDDEN, OUT OF NOWHERE my dad came in and asked if i would like to set up my own X-Box live account. (i have just recently had my 11th birthday and received an X-Box 360 before all my friends) Soi responded with a charming and simple "okay sure", and we were off.

So there we were, me and my dad, side by side, turning on my 360. It did it's little gay boot up sequence and then turned on. WE THEN had to go through the different channel things on the 360 till we got to the xbox live section. after that we CLICKED on the make xbox live account button.
 We set in all my personal details: my dads credit card number, my hair colour, my blood type, my home town, phone number, area of residence, last time i went to the bathroom, blah blah blah, you know, the usual.

And then it came down to one, final obstacle: THE NAME

So after hours of thinking, and trying, thinking and trying, thinking and trying, I FINALLY DID IT!!
I PRESSED ON THE BUTTON THAT SAID "generate random name" and there it was: So beautiful, just like a crispy fresh apple pie with a side of lamb chops in the garden at tea. Exiled microbe

It was the greatest name i had ever heard, and I've used it for everything ever since.

The names; Exiled microbe

Well well well, would you look at this? my very first blog post!! And what a thrilling experience this is!! WOW, i had no idea writing a blog was like THIS! IT IS SO AWESOME, I MEAN REALLY, IT'S JUST GREAT! but, enough about that, let's get on to business shall we?


My name is Exiled microbe, obviously. If you know me you'd know that's not my REAL name... or is it!? who knows??
I guess you're thinking right now "exiled microbe?? what the hell is that supposed to mean? is he retarded or something?"

hah but i can tell you, that this name does have a very interesting and lucrative origin for it. Yes, oh what a story that is. A story full of DANGER, THRILLS, EXCITEMENT and all that other juicy stuff. It was certainly, an adventure of a life time. And it went, like, this: